Amends

If you have behaved badly, repent, make what amends you can and address yourself to the task of behaving better next time. On no account brood over your wrongdoing. Rolling in the muck is not the best way of getting clean. Aldous Huxley

Aldous Leonard Huxley was an English writer and one of the most prominent members of the famous Huxley family. Best known for his novels including Brave New World and wide-ranging output of essays, Huxley also edited the magazine Oxford Poetry, and published short stories, poetry, travel writing, and film stories and scripts.

Aldous Huxley was a humanist and pacifist, and he was latterly interested in spiritual subjects such as parapsychology and philosophical mysticism. He is also well known for advocating and taking psychedelics.
By the end of his life Huxley was considered, in some academic circles, a leader of modern thought and an intellectual of the highest rank, and highly regarded as one of the most prominent explorers of visual communication and sight-related theories as well.
For a very long time I believed that making amends meant saying I was sorry. It reached a point in my life when those I apologized to made it clear that “I am sorry” would not suffice. I was confused. It was a hard lesson for me to learn, but I finally did understand that amends are not apologies to others, but rather admissions to myself about what I need to see in me and choose whether or not I want to change. This is a much more arduous process than saying I’m sorry.
At the beginning I blamed myself a great deal and thought little of me. I learned that I cannot change my past, but I can do something about my present. The first thing I could do was to stop blaming me and start changing me. I found that when I saw my opportunity to grow and chose to grow, the blaming stopped and the true amends began.
My prayer for you today is that you see where you really are and find the courage and faith to own and take responsibility for you as you are and know that by doing that change has already begun. My first amend was how I perceived me, not how you did.
Modern and independent Rabbi with an MSW Degree and 23 years of sobriety providing addiction counseling focusing on healing, spiritual guidance and personalized life cycle events. 
If you, a family member or friend are suffering, call me at 954-755-3764 to get the help you deserve.
Hugs and blessings for a joyous day!
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